Habits + Discipline

It takes 21 days to form a new habit - that's what we are told when we want to incorporate new behaviors in to our routine.

It takes no time to form a bad habit, but if it is something beneficial we have to work at it.

It takes time to unlearn bad behaviors.

What does it take to maintain a good habit? Discipline.

Discipline allows you to be repetitive for the long term.

Discipline says I'll do it even if I don't feel like it.

Discipline will get you through when the going gets tough.

Discipline produces a proven result; with discipline you have a guaranteed outcome.

Good habits without discipline is a set up for failure. Everyone needs discipline.

Discipline is  training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character (Merriam-webster.com)

To acquire discipline:

• Have a desire
• Commit to certain steps
• Strive to be consistent
• Have an accountability partner

In my own life I have seen the benefits of self discipline. For example, I always wanted good grades in school therefore I took my school work seriously - this was easy as youngster but became more challenging in college. When I joined the track team in HS, I didn't realize the rewards I would reap. One of the best things that came out of my track life (besides medals) was a new appreciation for discipline and how to apply it to every aspect of my life. I took the lessons of discipline that I learned and applied it to my:

Spiritual life - I start every day with pray and devotions

Work life - when dealing with difficult situations I realized that I had with in me to persevere

Physical life - labor and delivery; pushing myself to keep a home running; not complaining about fatigue

Life in general - pressing on when we don't always know what lies ahead

The only way to maintain good habits is through discipline. BTW – you can always tell a person that lacks discipline as they have no self control. 

The soul of the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat. Proverbs 13:4

Are you aware of your need for discipline? How do you exercise discipline in your life? Does this become easier as we get older?

Life is Not a Race

Since I've been on vacation, I've gotten three calls about people dying within the space of a week.

All that sadness, makes me want to appreciate life a little bit more (so I've included a few pictures from my vacation.)

As I was running recently, I got to thinking about life and realized that life is not a race. We hear it so often, but I don't think we stop to think about why.
Life is not a race because:

• A race is a defined distance - whether very long or very short. Because we know this we can adjust our pace accordingly based on where we are. If you're running a marathon, pacing is very important. If you're a sprinter, you run as fast as you can until you reach the finish line. In life we don't know how much time we are allotted, which makes it very difficult to know what pace we should be running at which time.
• A race has other competitors - when competing, we become familiar with the field and gauge ourselves against the others. Our goal is to win or do the best we can. During the race we are competitors, but afterwards we don't have to be. Competition breeds comparison. Since life is not a race, we shouldn't get stuck in comparing ourselves to others.
• You don't always have to stay in your lane - At the start of a distance race, you stay in your lane but for the majority of the race, after the cut over you can run in whatever lane you wish. Sometimes you have to run on the outside to pass people or to avoid others. Sometimes you can pass on the inside. A race is won from all lanes.
• We don't all have to run in the same way - Do you remember Michael Johnson? He had a very unconventional form, yet he was able to break many records.  Many coaches tried to change the way he ran, but he only had great success when he ran the way he was inherently made to run combined with some techniques. There is conventional wisdom and then there's what works for you. 

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. 1 Corinthians 9:24-25

Life has similarities to a race. With God's help, we can persevere and navigate our way through this life and receive what He has in store for us.   

Beach in the Bahamas

     

Boone Hall, Jamaica

Another Beach in the Bahamas

Hubby & I in Paradise Island, the Bahamas

Patriotism

I have seen patriotism in many forms and while I can't understand it, I can appreciate it.

Jamaica's 50th Independence Anniversary happened last year on Aug 6th and as such the entire country was a display of national pride. At church we sang the National Anthem as part of the service! I do love witnessing the national pride in Jamaica - the proud display of the colors, the lilt of patois  (I wished I spoke patois), and the incorporation of the green black and gold in to everything.

This year, I had the opportunity to visit the Bahamas, the country of my birth. It was my first time home in about 30 years. I had a flood of emotions while there: refreshing, relaxing, sad and scary all at once. The Bahamas is beautiful and small, and upon reflection I am glad I came from such a beautiful place.

I also had an opportunity to visit Barbados 4 years ago. While I was born in the Bahamas, my parents are from Barbados. Bajans (what Barbadians are called) have a very strong accent, so I primarily sound like a Bajan more than a Bahamian. As a child at school this was something to tease me about, and it sometimes made me have an identity crisis. When I visited Barbados, I felt like I had finally come home - the people sounded like me; I finally knew what I sounded like to others.

So, I married a Jamaican, who really loves his country. I was born in the Bahamas, my parents are from Barbados and I live in the United States. I have finally come to the realization that no one place is home for me because each place holds different memories and associations that I hold on to. National pride is evident in each of these countries.

Though I have a couple of earthly homes, I truly know that this world is not my home, and God truly out did Himself when he created such natural beauty in so many far flung places.

For this world is not our home; we are looking forward to our city in heaven, which is yet to come. Hebrews 13:14

Are you patriotic? Do you have a place that you call home? If you don't, how do you deal with it?

Dating and Relating in the 21st Century

As someone who has been married for close to a quarter century, I am beyond thankful that I don't have to navigate the murky waters of dating, mating and relating today. However, I have young adult children and I sometimes wonder if I've given them what they need to handle in this area.

Source

So many of my Christian friends have children that are not married with babies - so this is an area where I see many Christians struggle. It's almost as if they don't believe what the Bible says about purity, the motivations behind it and the blessings you reap. I have had friends say to me, "They're going to have sex any way, so what's the point?"

What's the point? God's guidelines bring us happiness not discontentment. If we all recognized this we wouldn't be so easily bamboozled in this area.

So in communicating with young adults this is where I start. There has to be a standard, a benchmark. There is a standard. Who sets the standard? God.

Why does that seem so hard? If you've seen God at work in other areas of your life why not your dating, mating and relating life? Why not?

It is also helpful to have boundaries defined prior to being in a situation. The best book I ever read on relationships that discussed this issue was by Les and Leslie Parrot. From a Christian point of view it talked about things we dance around - kissing, petting, touching and knowing where to draw the line. It was not formulaic.

As your children get older it may get harder or easier to communicate with them depending on the child and the circumstances. As an adult your beliefs determine your actions (i.e. it does no good to believe something and then live and speak contrary to what you believe). As much as possible, the elders should keep communicating with the younger ones about this area especially if they believe the guidelines that God has set.

Don't change your standard based on the culture; stand firm. Someone needs to do it for the next generation.

There is a way that seemeth right, but it also ends in destruction (Prov. 16:25)
"Whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God" (I Cor. 10:31).

What are your views on the dating scene as it relates to young people? Do you think there are more negative than positive influences today? How do you maintain dialogue in this area?