Wednesday, April 28, 2021

What I've Learned from Marriage and Motherhood


“Who can take a sunrise, sprinkle it with dew? Cover it with chocolate and a miracle or two?  The Candy Man…. The Candy Man can. The candy man can 'cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good.” I first heard the Sammy Davis version of this song on the radio and sang it to myself often. I never realized that I would have my own version of a popular candy: M&M’s®.

A Popular Candy
M&M’s themselves began as a reproduction of a foreign candy, named after two candy makers whose fathers were both candy magnates – Forrest Mars and Bruce Murrie. While abroad, Forrest Mars Sr. noticed British soldiers eating small, pill-sized candies called Smarties, made of a chocolate center and a hard candy shell. He was shocked to see that the candies held up in the summer heat and were small and easy to transport. Armed with his new knowledge, he moved back to the states to claim his spot in his father’s company. He secured a patent for the


Monday, April 12, 2021

How To Have Zen-like Peace


The phone rang. By the time the conversation was over, it felt like someone knocked the air out of my chest. Before I answered the phone I was happy, content. I noted that I had a zen-like peace. It was strange because there were anxious circumstances around me – family, job, relationships. I was beginning to revel in this feeling of peace which defied any human understanding.

After the phone call, the brick on my chest was painfully palpable. It hurt to breathe. But I had to keep going. I made some panicked phone calls then walked around the block with my husband. I started to beat myself up, wondering what role I played in this outcome. I came up empty. Then I started to ask why. The why seemed loud initially, but that zen-like peace wouldn’t disappear; it



Monday, March 22, 2021

Walking in the Rain

These days as we make the most of our restrictive environment, my mind wandered back to when I felt gloriously unrestrained.

We had settled into our new house in Brooklyn and had established a routine for day-to-day life. At the ripe old age of twelve, I took public transportation, navigating the streets of Brooklyn. I never felt afraid though I knew to be aware of my circumstances. 

One particular day, I was walking home from school because I missed my bus. It started to drizzle, and I realized I had no umbrella, nor was I wearing a jacket with a hood. We had an unspoken rule that we never got our hair wet as it meant washing, drying, braiding again. I had a relaxer at that time, so I also thought if my hair got wet, no big deal! (after all, wasn't that the point?) All of these thoughts ran through my mind initially as the rain became a steady


Monday, March 8, 2021

Prayers to Get You Through the Day


As a mom, wife, sister, and employee, the need for God’s constant presence through prayer is inevitable and palpable. When I’m flustered by the day-to-day tasks of motherhood, it is then I turn my gaze upwards seeking the One from whom my help comes. When I feel alone or unheard, I turn to Him remembering that he always hears me. When I’m at crossroads with decision-making, I seek wisdom from His voice and His word. At the end of each day, no matter how it went, I’m grateful that I made it to the end of the day, with His help.



Monday, February 15, 2021

Roots

“Good anticipation on her part!” that’s what the commentator said as we watched the back and forth of a tennis match. Good anticipation – being in the right place to return the shot. However, there was nothing good about our anticipation as we discovered one family’s history through a TV show.

I was twelve, a new immigrant. Before moving, we lived in the Bahamas. Life, for the most part, was uneventful, stable, and content. Then without warning, Daddy informed us that we’d be moving to NY. We were never given a good reason and just accepted what we were told. Also, in our household, no one, at least none of us children, questioned authority. My mom presented it as an adventure, but it couldn’t have been easy moving to another country with seven children and all of our earthly belongings. The only thing we anticipated was a life similar to what we left. Within a year of being in

NY, my hardworking parents were able to purchase a house. Until that point, we, a family of nine, lived upstairs at my uncle’s house in what is now considered a historic brownstone—nine of us in a space better suited for four. 

Our house's purchase was a milestone for our parents, which created a sense of normalcy and stability for our family. We had one TV, and every night in January of 1977, we were all glued to the TV as we watched Roots: The Saga of an American Family. Mummy, the more outspoken parent, probably was the one who made us aware. But after that first night, all nine of us watched with anticipation as we learned the mostly sordid truth of African American history. It was at once horrifying while instilling in us a sense of pride. Each night, we had no idea what to expect; we were riveted to the screen.


Monday, January 25, 2021

Divine Appointments

Recently I experienced the sting of deep disappointment. I shot my shot and hit the rim; the ball didn't quite make it through the net. When I started on this recent venture, I did not ignore the possibility of disappointment; I went in with my eyes wide open. 

As I prepared, I focused more on the possibility than the impossibility. I relied on verses that I knew, whispered positive affirmations to myself, had lots of conversations with God, took deep breaths, and ultimately took my shot. But I also kept it close to the vest, sharing with very few. I


Monday, January 11, 2021

Do you Have a Firm or Flimsy Foundation?


Anything built on an unstable or decaying foundation will not stand. One example of a famous foundation failure is the  South Padre Island’s Ocean Tower in Texas. Ocean Tower was originally designed to be a 31-story building that housed high-end condominiums. However, construction of the tower couldn’t be completed because of foundation problems discovered in early 2008. The expansive soil beneath the tower began to compact, causing the building to sink and lean. Construction ceased and the building had to be demolished in 2009. (source - https://www.structuredfoundation.com/blog/extreme-example-of-foundation-failure/)

Another famous example is the Leaning Tower of Pisa; it leans because its foundation is unstable.