If I Had Sneezed

On this annual commemoration of Martin Luther King, I took my granddaughter to a local celebration. Today I learned for the first time of this speech. I'd heard parts of it before, but not in the context of surviving a life-threatening event.

On April 3, 1968, Dr. King gave his last speech before being assassinated. Before this speech, a couple of years back, while he was at a book signing, a demented lady stabbed Dr. King with a

How Gossip Can Wreak Havoc

We may think saying things about another person that we have no knowledge of is harmless, but God knew what he was talking about when he lumped gossip with murder (Proverbs 6:16-19). A reckless tongue can do a world of damage and destroy relationships (James 3). In his letter to the Romans, Paul equates gossipers with “slanderers, God-haters” (Rom 1:30) and warns the Corinthians not to engage in “quarreling, jealousy, anger, selfishness, slander, gossip, conceit, and disorder” (2 Corinthians 12:20). As a refresher, gossip is defined as casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true. Gossip is the enemy hiding in plain sight.

Why Do You Fast?

It's that time of year again where churches encourage members to fast at the start of the year. To launch fasting in our household, we had a long discussion about what fasting means while reviewing Isaiah 58: 1-7. This chapter speaks about right and wrong ways to fast. In this passage, the reality was that God's people didn’t fast with the right heart and did it only as an empty ritual. The context of this passage focused on their relationships with others - the oppressed and the needy. But the overriding theme was not to do something just because you think it will please God without changing your ways. We were mindful of this thought as Monday dawned.

Broken Record

In the old days, the 70s, music was played on a record player or a phonograph. A record was a round flat disc with a small hole at its center that was used to place it on the turntable. As the turntable rotated the needle would touch the record. As the record rotated the music played beautifully. If there was a flaw in the record - it was scratched or warped, at each rotation. the music would skip or sound warbled. In order for this to stop, the needle had to be lifted and placed on a better part of the record.

Sometimes in life we sound like broken records - we are repeating the same thing over and over again with little variation. What leads us to this circular state? Do we feel unheard? Is our message important and no one is receptive? Or do we have the annoying gene?

When you constantly tell your children to pick up after themselves, yet they don't - you feel like a broken record.

When you ask your spouse to be on time, yet it doesn't happen - you feel like a broken record.

When you've suggested a better option at work and it's not acknowledged - you feel like a broken record.

When you tell your close circle of friends your relationship woes each time you get together - you are a broken record.

In all of these scenarios, you are talking to the wrong person. The next time you feel yourself spinning into broken record land, stop. As a flawed human, take the needle off the record. Look up and talk to God. Pour it all out - your frustration, anger, your minimized feelings, what you wish would happen....pour it all out. Then pause and listen. Ask God for the wisdom to deal with the situation. Perhaps it requires you changing your tactics, perhaps someone else will step in with the same message, perhaps you never mention it again, perhaps the solution has not materialized as yet.

Recognize that you are important and what you are saying is important. Be willing to live with an outcome that you may not have had in mind. If what you're saying is important enough, you will be heard and acknowledged, eventually. It's dealing with the eventually that's hard. Don't become a broken record to those around you, become a broken record to God - He doesn't mind one bit!

Draw near to God and he will draw near to you. James 4:8 [KJV]

Casting all your cares on Him for He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7 [KJV]

Do you ever feel like a broken record? How do you handle it?

A Chapter a Day - Proverbs 18

What a crazy world we live in - there's polarization of political parties and the character of the candidates is questioned based on what they say. Perhaps, all would do well by spending some time in Proverbs.

Proverbs 18 - There are lots of nuggets of wisdom in this chapter that deal with our speech, friendship, and wives. We're more than halfway done and we're benefiting immensely.

Observations and Highlights

Fools find no pleasure in understanding, but delight in airing their own opinions (v2). One of the hallmarks of a fool is that they're not good listeners. They love to hear themselves speak and bloviate but pay little attention to what others have to say.

Verses 4-8 contrast the words of the wise with the words of a fool.
The words of the wise are deep, plenteous, and helpful. The words of the fool are contentious, destructive, hurtful and shallow. The tongue holds the power of life or death (v21).

He who answers a matter before hearing it, it is folly and shame unto him (v13). Listen before answering. Don't interrupt when others are speaking. For bigger issues, weigh all options before answering. This sounds like Communication 101 - a class I may have taken in college or on the job. Good communication is essential in all relationships including marriage.

It seems that the writer shifts to marriage at this point, but the principles about communication and being foolish and wise are applicable. So first, he lets us know it is an honor to have a wife. He who finds a wife finds a good thing and receives favor from the Lord (v22). For wives, know that you are a good thing. Then, for husbands, he reminds them that they found their good thing, so treat her accordingly (1 Peter 3:7). It is not a  stretch to say that husbands and wives would be better served if they communicated as if they were wise persons to each other.

A man that has friends must show himself friendly, and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother (v 24). If you're married, one of the friendships you have automatically is the friend found in your spouse, and in my experience, most spouses stick closer than a brother. Your spouse is with you through thick and thin. If you're not married, you still have to put in the effort to being a friend; you have to nurture the relationships in your life. It's when times are tough that we begin to see who our true friends are. They visit you in the hospital if you're ill, they lend a hand if you're down, they comfort you when things aren't going right. They have a heart that seems to beat to your heartbeat - that's a true friend. This verse also speaks of reciprocity - true friendship is not one-sided. Lastly, when we have friends that are there for us, it is similar to the relationship we have with our Greatest Friend, Jesus. Only He truly embodies unconditional love and sacrifice.

Read on.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on these verses or others that stood out to you.

Four Letter Words

Source

Recently I was on a work phone call where most of the participants were disgusted and frustrated with a particular facet of their function. This led one participant to let loose a string of four letter expletives which were jarring to the other participants. To say that he was pissed was an understatement; we could all empathize, but the remainder did not choose to express ourselves in this manner. Some of us were just angry.
As I listened, the anger without the expletives sounded just as bad as the guy spewing invective. They were both jarring.

I get so hung up on people using four letter words that I sometimes forget we can be just as offensive with our speech even when we don't curse.

When Peter denied Jesus the third time, he cursed vehemently in his denial. I don't know what words he used but the scripture says, "Then began he to curse and to swear, saying, I know not the man. And immediately the cock crew. And Peter remembered the word of Jesus, which said unto him, Before the cock crow, thou shalt deny me thrice. And he went out, and wept bitterly." Matthew 26:74-75 [KJV]

Once Peter recognized what he had done - his denial and the way he denied Christ, he went out and wept bitterly.

Hurtful, offensive and coarse language makes us weep bitterly. As Christians, let's make every effort to elevate our speech; let's not throw around expletives carelessly. Let's be mindful that our words have an impact and that as Christians we are expected to act differently. God has this expectation of us and believe it or not, the world does also. Even in anger, let's try to be mindful of what we say before it is expressed. As Christians, we have an old nature and a new nature. With the help of the Holy Spirit, we can tame our tongues.

Take control of what I say, O Lord, and guard my lips. Psalms 141:3 [NLT]

Do you struggle with four letter words? What are you doing to change?